in actuality....

I have come a long way from being a complete idiot. Trust me in this statement.

Actually, I know I have a long way to go.


I do not like getting protective of my friends. They are grown up after all. (well... SOME of them are LOL)
I still have this need to try and make people aware of choices.
I think I will just shut up and let them live what they choose.

Sometimes, I get really tired of always being in my head. It is what keeps me on edge of sleep. It keeps me in a solitary state of being and occasionally I peek out at others.
It seems I am always learning SOMETHING.... and I may remember it or choose to forget it. One way or the other I have used the knowledge in my head.


My kids just called and they have the key to the house in their hands :)
VERY excited they are. Zephyr is coming up to stay a week with Toni and Steve. I will not get to see my little love as I am at work and school while he is here.

3 more weeks and I am done. .. with classes for now. I have to figure out how to pay for the rest of my school so I can then pay to take my tests. Then take my test.. ..
a little frustrated. I can work it out.

Turning 50 was rather peaceful. I had a wonderful massage, wore a new dress, grocery shopped, and took my final in A&P. Passed the test and then a few of my classmates and my Friend Linda met me for light dinner and a drink at Uncle Julio's. I received the most beautiful and heartwarming card from my Momma.

Some events will always stay in my mind.

I am missing my son. Not sure why so deeply right now but I do. I am very proud of him. Very. He has shown great independence and movement forward in his choice. He may not see events as that now, later he will.

I am fine on my own these days. Emotionally peaceful. Still learning of my attitude though.

In actuality there may be struggles, but peace at heart is where I am at.